Sunday, December 26, 2010

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

I find myself in a interesting conundrum. Five months ago I would say I had a very strong health paradigm that I lived by:
·         The body has an innate ability to heal itself 
·         The most important tool is a strong immune system
·         Emotions manifest themselves physically if not managed well
·         I normally seek out an alternative treatment rather than conventional medicine
5 months ago I was told I had cancer and that I needed to start chemo treatments within 2 weeks.  Pressure to manage fears – mine, Ron’s, my family – shut down my natural instincts to research alternatives and I jumped into a conventional approach.  Now I find that I have completely compromised my immune system to the extent that the chemo actually caused a lung infection which made me sicker than I’ve ever been.  I’m taking multiple medications to manage all the side effects, and I’m routinely infusing my system with toxic chemicals that indiscriminately kill all cells – good and bad.
A couple of weeks ago I learned that my daughter in law’s mother – Wendey has been researching cancer cures and preventative measures.  She has shared this information with me and I have been voracious in reading and researching.  What I’m finding is that there are other ways to manage and cure cancer that don’t have the devastating side effects.  In a perfect world I would stop the treatments today and move into testing the methods that resonate with me.  I know that would horrify Ron and my family who just want me to get well.  I only have 3 more of the toxic treatments left – but I have about 50 of the biological treatment herceptin left.  I’m very concerned about the long term effects of what I have done to my body.  I read an article last night from the November/December 2010 – Well Being Journal that talks about that.  It was enough to really concern me. 

In order to feel better about what is happening to me I've decided to incorporate some of the nutritional suggestions I’ve found such as blending cottage cheese and flax seed oil (with an immersion blender to develop the chemical reaction necessary to treat the cancer), as well as fresh vegetables and fruit, green tea, less eggs and meat, and trying to add turmeric/cumin to more foods (a proven cancer “stopper”).  I’m also planning to detoxify as rapidly as possible once I’ve completed the last three taxol treatments by using acupuncture, massage, and going to a day spa for a body wrap to remove toxins. 
I'm becoming more and more convinced by what I read that the pharmaceutical companies have too much money to lose and will never actually find the “cure” because it will not serve them.  Money is a powerful motivator for the whole chain of conventional medicine.  I'm not saying Doctors intentionally put you into bad treatment, I just think they are caught up in a system that is so steeped in tradition and ridgity, and has major consequences if they go outside of the conventional system.  This is not a surprise to me as I worked in the medical field for 7 years in my 20’s and observed just how the whole system works.  As an aside – did you know that Dr’s and hospitals actually purchase their chemotherapy drugs wholesale from the drug companies and then mark them up to make a profit?  As I said money is a great motivator – the more patient’s on chemo the more money we all generate for the medical machine. 
Information is power, and for the first time in 5 months I'm beginning to feel like I'm taking back some of my power by becoming more educated.  Everyday Ron and I see ads on tv by drug companies, with a very pleasant voice telling you to ask your doctor about the latest drug (being advertised) and then the singsong voice goes on to tell you all of the side effects that you "might" experience as a result of taking this so called "cure."  I can remember laughing at more than a few them and asking Ron if they just said that my acne will be cured but I might die as a result of a side effect....  Are they for real??!!  Can you imagine if they advertised chemotherapy drugs what they would have to say.  I shudder to think. Yet here I am like a lemming docilely marching into the chemotherapy machine and letting myself be poisoned, my immune system be destroyed, and living with a daily blood nose, declining vision, receding gums, etc...  I shudder to think what the long term effects are going to be. 
At 4:00 am (after being awake since 2:30 thinking about all this) I’ve decided that the most important thing I can do for myself if to rebuild my immune systems so I've come up with a new affirmation to at least start the mind body process:

I am easily and successfully strengthening my immune system by incorporating physical activity and clean eating into my daily lifestyle.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I kind of agree w/ you..I sometimes wonder if this whole chemo thing, is seems like so many people get so sick from it..but then I know some that have been through some of them & their cancer, is gone & for way more than 5's a very double edged sword decision & of course, you are dealing w/ other people hom love you, also. I do have to tell you, that I know many cancer Dr.'s & yes, they do mark up the drugs more than what they pay for them, but that is so they can stay open,pay their bills, staff's salaries & their h2o,lights,ac/heat,mortgage etc. they themselves do not make a lot of money on it. I know it stinks them doing this..but IF they don't pay their bills, they can't have a practice, which in turn means, eventually, there would be no Dr.'s. Like everything in life there are two sides/explanations to all subjects. Hope you don't mind..but this is the other half of what you said. I'm not sure about hospitals..they have so much to pay for..union workers, being the biggest cost & law suits, being the other & IF it's corporate hospital, well then you have to pay all those CEO's so they can own 7 houses & a private plane (being snide here, now).
You're attitude is wonderful & I think you are doing the right thing, reading all you can about it..educating yourself,asking questions,debating their actions of least you are making informed decisions & can live w/ your own choices, instead of someone else's. I'm really proud of you for doing takes Carona's to do that..not everyone is strong enough to be that way ! BRAVO ! xoxo Deb