Started chemo today. Overslept an hour so was late – nurses thought this was pretty funny as most people don’t sleep the night before. Little do they know I couldn’t get to sleep so probably overslept from exhaustion!
Nurses (Suzie, Susan, and Rebecca) – all nice - all have been there 20-30 years. Suzie spent most of the time with me. She is 52, and easy to talk to. She was surprised that I don’t take any meds, that I eat organic and am generally healthy. She told me that used to be my “normal”, now my “new normal” will involve lots of meds, etc…and that I can’t skip anything. She really stressed this. So I will still eat organic, but I need to rap my head around the rest.
Anyway – Hated the IV….ouch! first meds to drip were the anti nausea, then the pink drug arythromycin (sp?)– “pushed”, and then the Cytoxin – an hour drip.
Arythromycin – pressuring in the arm with the IV – could feel it travel into my hand and shoulder – then got a little cramping in pelvis, and axillary node
Cytoxin – got a couple of hot flashes, took awhile but started to feel numbness in my jaw and teeth, under my eyes and then started to travel down the sides of my nose. The traveling brought a slight burn with it – like a little river of burn – also felt the burn in the back of my neck and scalp – also the breast lump. I also remember feeling like my whole system was vibrating a little but that seemed to settle after awhile.
Was very hungry after the treatment so we stopped in a coffee shop in the hospital and got a yogurt, gluten free bar and a coffee. Got in the car and Ron and I head down to NC. About an hour into the trip I started to get a headache and manageable nausea. Ended up snacking on peanut butter stuffed pretzels – tasted great while I was eating them (especially the salt) but as soon as I stopped the nausea kicked in again. Shannon said it almost sounds like pregnancy nausea and she’s right. You can keep it at bay a few nibbles at a time. We stopped at Hopewell (our usual) and I got a strawberry and banana smoothie – that seemed to feel better than anything else I had tried (probably will skip the cup of coffee next time – but still do the yogurt). It was a little too sweet but options were limited.
By the time we got to NC I was feeling pretty bad. My whole body felt heavy, my stomach was queasy, my headache was worse and I generally felt disoriented or a little left of center. Couldn’t ground myself at all. Ended up spending the afternoon on the couch – found it too much effort to go upstairs and lie down – and didn’t really want to do that anyway. I thought I could just put mind over matter and make it go away. You wonder if you are just manifesting all the symptoms or are they real. But then reality is your manifestation….expect I couldn’t get a handle on this one. Finally started to feel more like myself around 7:00. I did finally break down and take the nausea med and a couple of ibuprofen around 6:30 so maybe that helped?
Was supposed to go to a movie and out to dinner with Shannon and Anya (it was Anya’s birthday on the 26th), but didn’t really feel up to it. Richie & Layla came over for a while – Ron and Ronnie were golfing.
Went to bed about 11:00 and slept until 4:00am. I’ve been awake since. Tried to sleep but my mind just keeps running through all kinds of stuff – the kids marriages and their communication difficulties, whether I should get a wig, keep my hair appointment for a cut and color on Tuesday, the surgery on Monday, etc….even did a chakra cleansing but that didn’t put me back to sleep either. Finally gave up at 7:00 and got up. I was starving – but the headache has dissipated as well as the dizziness. Don’t have the heaviness in my body anymore either.
Not sure what’s up for the day, but heading back home later this afternoon. Emotions seem to be running pretty high for everyone.